Are we teaching them that some risks are worth the consequences?
This is not how prevention approaches the use of tobacco, drugs, and alcohol. Parents and teachers use every scientific argument known to be directive and adamant about abstaining from these substances and there are laws designed to prevent youth and adults from engaging or promoting such risky behaviors. This approach is the reason that tobacco use among teens has dramatically decreased over the past twenty-years.
Yet, when risky behaviors pertain to sexual activity, parents, teachers, and even law enforcement, become ambivalent and provide wishy-washy guidance, at best, leaving young people exposed to the consequences of sex without boundaries. Why do we shrink back from using every medically accurate, scientific fact to teach our teens and young adults how to abstain and set clear boundaries for appropriate sexual activity?
Why are we, in fact, doing just the opposite?
Many parents tell us that they feel like hypocrites telling their teens to delay sex, even until marriage, because they did not do so. This is exactly how societies go from bad to worse! Adults need to know that this is no longer about them and their sexual history! They have a chance to effect their child’s future. They need to refocus their attention onto what is best for their children and their peers. They need to give them the best sexual health messages, because that’s what most good parents do.
Many Comprehensive Health Ed programs in our schools add-on pregnancy and STD prevention curricula found on the Planned Parenthood website. These curricula teach sexual foreplay techniques with condoms to 11-16 year old teens, under the guise of HIV/STD prevention. Rather than teach clear, protective boundaries, they teach what teens/adults can get away with in our culture. With the clear and unambiguous boundaries of marriage and monogamous life-long fidelity rapidly disappearing from our culture, Sexual Rights have become the predominant message.
However, even with hormonal birth control and condoms, sexual activity still leads to predictable consequences such as pregnancy, disease, and life-long regret. Planned Parenthood, and other abortion services, benefit financially when the inevitable happens. No wonder they push these programs in our schools.
For at least the past three decades, Sex Ed in our schools, military, and colleges has abandoned the science of reproduction, and the medical and social benefits of abstinence and pregnancy prevention. Sex Ed is almost entirely about how to reduce the risks of sex, while still having “erotic, fun, and pleasurable” sex with condoms.
Sex education is an integral part of a worldwide Sexual Rights Agenda that fails to protect the rights of its victims to be really safe and free from harm.
While adults can legally make decisions about their sexual risks, minors and teens cannot, and they deserve legal and social protections from this dangerous agenda and from the adults who indulge in it.
Just two decades ago, military and civilian personnel were effectively trained on sexual harassment using actual court cases, so that they would know the clear boundaries they must follow to stay out of trouble. In recent years, Red, Yellow and Green Light trainings deal with tolerating the sexual behaviors of others and how far a person can go without violating “consent.” Or, how to obtain “consent” without being charged with harassment, sexual abuse or rape.
The lessons taught are about how to avoid the consequences of behavior, not about how to avoid the behavior leading to the consequences. This strategy has never worked for alcohol, drugs, and tobacco use.
Why do we insanely insist that it will work for out-of-bounds sexual activity?
Click on the pictures below. These are very similar sex lessons taught to students, under the guise of HIV Prevention. These sex lessons are known as Red, Yellow and Green Light Activities, found in Making A Difference! (pg. 120) for middle schools and in Be Proud! Be Responsible! (pg. 54) for high schools. Both curricula are produced by Select Media and are provided “FREE” to school districts and “Safe Sex-only” agencies around the nation with Federal and State grants using our tax money.
The purported goal of these lessons is to encourage the use of condoms (protected sex) while engaging in so-called “safe sex.” All of these activities are openly discussed in class as “safe” or “unsafe” ways to express sexual feelings. The Yellow Light activities are presented as “safe,” as long as condoms are used consistently and correctly at every incidence of sex. Even some of the Green Light activities are suspect, and the Red Light activities are really not off limits, as long as “protection” is used.
Even the CDC has stopped using percent effectiveness of condoms against HIV/STD transmission in their most recent Fact Sheet. They only claim that condoms are “highly effective.” However, condoms are only effective if used consistently and correctly during every act of vaginal sexual intercourse. The CDC warns about anal sex, yet promotes condoms for this activity, especially for gay and bisexual men.
Factor in normal human behavior, and the consequences from engaging in these sexual activities are just a “roll of the dice.” One does not get to choose which consequence(s) – STDs, pregnancy, depression, school failure, suicide, or nothing – they would prefer to endure.
“Better to be safe, than sorry” use to be the prevailing wisdom.
Now it is simply, “What can I get away with!”
This is not wisdom and it protects no one.
Find out if any of these sexual foreplay programs are in your child’s school district: Making A Difference!, Making Proud Choices!, Be Proud! Be Responsible!, Safer Choices, It’s Your Game, Draw the Line/Respect the Line, Teen Outreach Program, and Promoting Health Among Teens.
If you need help, contact us at ExposeSexEd@gmail.com. Let us know what is in your school district. If you don’t know, find out! That’s what good parents do!